John 21:1-19
If you were to read the four gospels, there is an interesting thing that stands out. It has to do with the chief of the apostles, Peter. The gospel writers refer to him consistently as “Peter” or “Simon Peter”. John seems to prefer “Simon Peter”. The other gospel writers are not so consistent.
We all know how the fisherman Simon got the name of Peter. It was at that moment when Jesus asked, “Who do you say that I am?” The apostles had various guesses, but Simon said, “You are the Messiah of God” or words to that effect. And Jesus answers, “Blessed are you, Simon, because flesh and blood did not reveal this to you, but my Father in Heaven. And I tell you that you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church”. The so-called synoptic gospels all tell the same story with slightly different words. In the Gospel of John, though, it is when Peter’s brother Andrew introduces Peter to Jesus, that Jesus looks at him and says, “You are Simon, son of John, You will be called Cephas *(which is translated as Peter). Because Cephas means rock, and so does Peter.
But that is literally the only place that Jesus calls the leader of the apostles by a name other than Simon, and the writer of John’s gospel takes pains to translate the term Cephas, so as near as we can tell, according ot John, at least, Jesus never addresses him as Peter; it’s always “Simon” or Simon, son of John”. And yet, John the gospel writer freely uses the name Peter, or sometimes “Simon Peter” when he is telling his story. And so here we are at the end of John’s gospel, as he describes the last encounter Jesus will have with his apostles, before his ascension into heaven. And Jesus only uses the name “Simon” in the last conversation he will have with Peter.
The conversation is recorded in today’s gospel. If we heard it in Greek, it might sound something like this: “Simon, do you love me enough to die for me?” Because Jesus uses the greek word “agape”. And Simon replies “Lord, you know that I love you like a brother” because Simon uses the word “phylia” which means “to love like you would love a brother.”. Jesus askes the same question a second time, and Simon replies the same way. Finally Jesus asks the question a little differently: Simon, do you love me like a brother?” and that is when Simon gets distressed and replies, “You know I love you like a brother”.
Peter has been Jesus’ disciple for three years; he’s followed him up and down the roads of Galilee, and finally to Jerusalem. Peter has more than once spoken from his heart about his love and loyalty to Jesus. But when it comes down to proving his loyalty and love, Peter claimed that he never heard of Jesus, not once but three times. And in all the appearances Jesus made after his resurrection up till now, he never speaks directly to Peter. And I wonder what was going through Peter’s mind. Guilt, sure. Regret, most likely. But Peter has been tested, and failed the test. And he knows it. Remember how this scene at the lake started? Peter said to his fellow disciples, “I am going fishing”. Did he decide to go back to his old way of life because he felt that Jesus would never forgive him?
And then Jesus speaks to him. He calls him “Simon” not Peter. In doing so he brings Peter back to the time they first met. And in his question, Jesus is asking about the depth of Peter’s love, about it’s quality. And Peter can only answer, not as much as I should, not as much as I want to. I love you as much as I can, but not as much as you want. And in Jesus’ third question, he accepts what Peter has to offer. Jesus accepts that Peter’s love is not complete, not enough to die for him. And yet Jesus doesn’t take away Peter’s position as the leader of his church, in fact, he reinforces it in front of the other apostles. Feed my lambs; tend my sheep; feed my sheep. And Jesus promises that a day will come when Peter will love him enough to die for him; they will stretch out his hands and dress him and lead him to where he does not want to go -- a reference to Peter’s crucifixion, when he dies like his master. To me this scene on the shore is consoling. It tells me that Jesus accepts my imperfect love, and despite all my imperfections and lack of boldness, he will continue too love me and use me, a very imperfect instrument. And while I live I can hope to grow in my love for Him.
Jesus names Simon Peter, which means “Rock”. But the name Simon has a meaning as well. It means “the one who hears”. Let us all hear those words, “Do you love me?” and let us respond, “As much as I can, Lord”.