John 13:31-33a, 34-35
When I was very young, about three
years old, my mother and father, without asking me, had another
child, my sister. At first I was intrigued although I would probably
have preferred a brother, or at least a puppy. But as time went on I
began to notice things had changed. My attempts to get attention
were not being answered, especially when she was awake. And
sometimes I was being told to be quiet, so that she could sleep.
Needless to say, as the two of us got older, there were many times
when we got into conflicts. And my parents would tell me to quit
teasing her or annoying her because, get this, she was my sister.
And the reverse was true. Many disagreements were nipped in the bud
because of the reminder that we were brother and sister. My sister
and I are not at all alike. If we weren't related, we probably
wouldn't have any sort of relationship.
I don't fight with my sister anymore.
Sadly, we live on opposite sides of the country and are so involved
in our own lives that we don't have much to communicate about. But
in my daily prayers I always remember her.
I think it's interesting that Jesus
tells his disciples that he is giving them a new commandment. You
can look up all kinds of speculation as to why this is a new
commandment; after all, way back in Deuteronomy the Jews were
commanded to love your neighbor as yourself. And you can find
authorities from other religions who say similar things. One idea is
that Jesus urges his disciples to love each other as he loves them –
in other words, the new commandment means to be willing to sacrifice
oneself for the other. But Jesus died for all humanity and I can't
do that, so maybe that isn't the reason. Another idea is that Jesus
is commanding his disciples to love beyond the bounds of family or
tribe or race, and that seems to be strengthened by his parable about
the Good Samaritan. But even though there are people around who
claim to love humanity, I don't think those words mean anything.
Love isn't anything unless it leads to action. So how did Jesus love
his disciples? In practical terms, he invited them into his family.
When we meet Jesus' disciples in the scriptures, there's a lot there
not to like. Peter is always speaking before he thinks, and in the
end his boast that even if the others rejected Jesus, he never would,
proved to be hollow. James and John asked Jesus if they should call
down lightning on people who did not accept his message. They picked
up the nickname “Sons of Thunder” And we will never forget Judas.
We don't think about it too much, but over the years of Jesus'
ministry, he never gave up on them, even though they often failed to
understand him. And in the end he proclaims that they are no longer
servants, but friends.
Notice that Jesus tells his disciples
to love one another. I have loved, in the sense of having deep
friendship with, people of other faiths and of no faith at all. This
is all well and good. But we believe that even though God loves
every human being as much as God can love, we become brothers and
sisters of Jesus through baptism; we become members of his family.
And while I can love someone not in the family, he commands me to
love those who are in the family just as he loved them. And in the
original Greek, Jesus uses the word “philos” which is the love
between brothers and sisters, not “agape” which is the love that
sacrifices oneself. Higb And that may be where we could all use some
work, myself no exception. Because you and I are a family. We are a
family by baptism, and by intention, since we come together around
the family supper table to share the Lord's supper. But for many of
us, that's where it ends. We see the same faces every Sunday because
we usually sit in the same pews; we exchange a sign of peace – a
handshake or a wave or maybe we wiggle our fingers; but does the
relationship ever get any deeper? Do we do anything to invite that
brother or sister into a deeper relationship in which love begins to
be possible? My efforts could definitely use work, and probably
yours could as well.
Jesus is saying that the way we should
love each other is the way he loves us – and yet, we are mostly
indifferent to each other.
So how do we change things? As usual,
little by little. First, there has to be a little courage, to take
the first step. Today as you leave Church why not go up to someone
you don't know and introduce yourself? Exchange a little
information. Now you have a new brother or sister, and it will be
easier to talk with that person next Sunday. And it will feel good
as well, because we are after all social creatures. And the next
time you have some time on your hands and feel the urge to get
involved in something, look to your parish community first, before
you get involved in some other activity. We brothers and sisters
have to stick together, we have to support each other. And the next
time you are talking with a friend and some third party begins to get
dissected, if that third party is your brother or sister, you have no
business letting that kind of thing go on. This is a good parish; we
are lucky to have so much going on, we are fortunate to be a fairly
wealthy parish. But I think we could all do better following Jesus
new commandment.
Because Jesus doesn't give us his new
commandment, to love one another as he loves us, just to make
everyone feel good. He does it because that is what he wants for the
whole human race, and it starts with us. If we love one another as
brothers and sisters, as members of the same family, making the
relationships between us a priority, not in the abstract but in
concrete ways, people will notice. And if people see something good
they will be attracted; and some of those who are attracted will join
us and become part of the movement Jesus came to start. He said, “I
came to cast fire upon the earth and I wish it were already burning!”
And if people are to see that we are his disciples, then we have to
love each other. We don't love each other because it feels good. In
our love for each other, is there the possibility that someone
observing us would say, “those must be disciples of Jesus!”
That's the yardstick to measure our love.
