MATTHEW 14:22-33
POOR OLD PETER. HE
RECOGNIZES JESUS AS THE MESSIAH, AND IN THE NEXT BREATH IS TELLING
HIM HE SHOULDN'T TALK ABOUT BEING PUT TO DEATH. HE SEES JESUS
TRANSFIGURED AND SPEAKING WITH MOSES AND ELIJAH, AND IMMEDIATELY
WANTS TO PUT UP SOME TENTS OR STRUCTURES FOR THESE MEN WHO OBVIOUSLY
DON'T NEED ANYTHING PETER COULD PROVIDE. HE SWEARS HE WILL NEVER
BETRAY JESUS, THEN SHORTLY AFTERWARD DENIES THAT HE KNOWS THE MAN.
AND OF COURSE THERE'S TODAY'S GOSPEL, WHERE POOR OLD PETER NEARLY
DROWNS BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE THE REQUIRED AMOUNT OF FAITH. (OF
COURSE WE KNOW HE COULD SWIM, BECAUSE AFTER THE RESURRECTION, HE
JUMPED OUT OF THE BOAT AND SWAM TO SHORE WHEN HE RECOGNIZED JESUS.)
I THINK WHEN WE SEE PETER
OR ONE OF THE OTHER APOSTLES FAILING TO GET IT, OR TRYING TO DO
SOMETHING AND NOT SUCCEEDING, WE REACT WITH A TINY BIT OF
SUPERIORITY; AND IT'S PARTLY DUE TO THE FACT THAT PREACHERS TURN
THESE STORIES INTO OBJECT LESSONS. “LOOK AT PETER, WHO DOESN'T
HAVE ENOUGH FAITH. JESUS WANTS YOU TO HAVE LOTS OF FAITH.” LOOK
AT PETER, WHO BETRAYS CHRIST. GOD DOESN'T WANT YOU TO BETRAY
CHRIST!” YOU'VE ALL HEARD SERMONS LIKE THIS.
BUT MAYBE THERE'S MORE
HERE THAN IT SEEMS. WHEN YOU LOOK CLOSELY AT THE STORY, PETER AND
THE OTHERS THINK THEY ARE LOOKING AT A GHOST, AND THEY ARE TERRIFIED.
THEN PETER, WHO HAS MORE COURAGE THAN THE REST, I GUESS, SAYS “LORD,
IF IT IS YOU, COMMAND ME TO COME TO YOU ON THE WATER.” AND WHEN
JESUS SAYS “COME”, PETER STEPS OUT OF THE BOAT. NOW WE DON'T
NOW HOW LONG PETER WALKED ON THE WATER. THE POINT WAS THAT HE BEGAN
TO SINK. THINK ABOUT IT. PETER GAVE THE GHOST A CHALLENGE – IF IT
IS REALLY YOU, TELL ME TO COME TO YOU. AND THE GHOST SAID, “COME”.
BUT WHAT WOULD GO THROUGH YOUR MIND IF YOU TRUST THE GHOST NOW AND
THEN STARTED TO SINK? I WOULD PROBABLY DECIDE THAT THAT WASN'T THE
LORD, BECAUSE HE WASN'T HOLDING UP HIS END OF THE BARGAIN. AND WHEN
I SANK I WOULD BE TELLING MY BROTHER APOSTLES, “SAVE ME!”. BUT
PETER MADE WHAT THEY CALL A LEAP OF FAITH – EVEN THOUGH HE WASN'T
WALKING ON WATER AS PROMISED, HE STILL CRIED OUT, “LORD, SAVE ME!”
HE STILL TRUSTED JESUS.
THE THEOLOGIAN KARL
RAHNER SAID THAT EVENTUALLY EVERYONE WOULD HAVE TO CHOOSE BETWEEN
BEING A MYSTIC AND BEING AN ATHEIST. THERE ARE MANY PEOPLE WHO SAY
THEY BELIEVE, BUT THEY DON'T PRACTICE. BUT THERE ARE MANY OTHERS WHO
PRACTICE, BUT DON'T REALLY BELIEVE. OH, THEY BELIEVE IN COMING TO
CHURCH, PARTICIPATING IN THE SACRAMENTS, MAYBE EVEN DONATING TIME AND
MONEY TO THE CHURCH. BUT JESUS ISN'T REAL FOR THEM. RELIGION MEANS
LIVING A GOOD LIFE AND BELONGING TO SOMETHING LARGER THAN YOURSELF.
OR MAYBE IT MEANS BEING AFRAID THAT WHAT YOU LEARNED AS A CHILD IS
TRUE – THERE MIGHT REALLY BE A HELL, AND AS ONE ELDERLY LADY TOLD
ME, “I'M JUST HOPING TO GET TO PURGATORY”. BUT EACH OF US AT
SOME POINT IN OUR LIFE HAS TO BECOME A MYSTIC; WE HAVE TO GET AWAY
FROM THE NOISE AND OTHER PEOPLE, AND CONFRONT OURSELVES. WE HAVE TO
STEP OUT OF THE BOAT. WE HAVE TO FACE THOSE SCARY FACTS: I AM WEAK,
SINFUL, AND I LIE TO MYSELF. I AM ULTIMATELY ALONE, EVEN WHEN
SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS AND FAMILY. I AM GOING TO DIE, AND MY BODY IS
ALREADY WEARING OUT. THERE ARE PEOPLE I CANNOT FORGIVE. I HAVE
ADDICTIONS – MAYBE NOT TO ALCOHOL OR TOBACCO OR DRUGS, BUT THERE
ARE THINGS THAT WOULD BE VERY PAINFUL TO GIVE UP. THERE ARE MANY
THINGS ABOUT MY LIFE THAT I SHOULD CHANGE, BUT I'M TOO LAZY. THERE
ARE THINGS I PLANNED TO DO, BUT NOW I KNOW I WILL NEVER DO THEM. AND
THE SCARIEST NOTION OF ALL – IS THERE REALLY A GOD WHO ACTUALLY
LOVES ME AND CARES ABOUT ME? OR IS IT ALL A DELUSION?
WHEN I LOOK DEEP INSIDE
MYSELF, WHEN I AM QUIET AND NOT DISTRACTED, I DON'T LIKE WHAT I SEE.
MAYBE THAT'S WHY THE GREATEST SAINTS, WHO WERE CERTAINLY FAR GREATER
MYSTICS THAN YOU AND I, ALWAYS SAW THEMSELVES AS SINNERS.
THERE'S A REASON WHY
PEOPLE IN THE DEVELOPED WORLD ARE FALLING AWAY FROM RELIGION. IT'S
BECAUSE THEY NO LONGER KNOW THEMSELVES; IT'S SO EASY TO BE
DISTRACTED, SO EASY TO LET THE CULTURE WE LIVE IN TELL US HOW TO
THINK. AND OUR CULTURE SAYS, THERE IS NO SIN; ACCEPT YOURSELF AS YOU
ARE; IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU BELIEVE, AS LONG AS YOU ARE SINCERE.
AND OUR CULTURE SAYS, “DON'T THINK ABOUT ALL THOSE SCARY FACTS!
FILL YOUR DAY WITH BUSYNESS; AND WHEN YOUR DAY IS OVER, READ THE
PAPER, WATCH TV, SURF THE NET – UNTIL YOU ARE TOO TIRED TO DO
ANYTHING, THEN GO TO SLEEP AND START OVER IN THE MORNING. AND LIKE
THE APOSTLES WHO REMAINED IN THE BOAT, IT'S EASIER TO STICK TO WHAT
WE KNOW, TO STICK TO OUR ROUTINE, THAN TO CONFRONT THAT ANGRY SEA
INSIDE US.
BUT IT IS ONLY WHEN WE
QUIETLY FACE THOSE SCARY THOUGHTS, THOSE THINGS WE WOULD RATHER NEVER
THINK ABOUT, THAT WE UNDERSTAND HOW BADLY WE NEED A SAVIOR, HOW BADLY
WE NEED A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO KNOWS OUR DARKEST SECRETS,
WHO HAS FACED OUR HIDDEN FEARS; WHO OFFERS TO LISTEN TO WHAT WE DON'T
EVEN WANT TO TELL OURSELVES, LET ALONE OUR LOVED ONES. AND THERE IN
OUR SILENCE WHEN WE ASK OURSELVES THE SCARY QUESTIONS, WE DISCOVER
THAT THE LOVER OF OUR SOUL IS THERE, THE ONE WHO CAN SAVE US. AND
LIKE PETER WE WILL HAVE A CHOICE TO MAKE – TO TURN BACK TO THE
BOAT, TO AND REMAIN IN THAT FALSE REALITY WHERE I'M OK AND YOU'RE OK,
AND THE ONLY SIN IS ACTUALLY ACTING ON MY RELIGIOUS BELIEFS – OR TO
LEARN THAT I ACTUALLY NEED A SAVIOR IN THE WORST WAY, AND TO TRUST IN
THAT GHOST-LIKE FIGURE WE CAN BARELY SEE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STORM
AND CRY OUT, “LORD, SAVE ME!”
