Feast of the Holy Family, 2012

LUKE 2:41-52

WHEN I WAS GROWING UP, I REMEMBER A SERMON GIVEN ON THIS FEAST. THE PRIEST WENT ON AND ON ABOUT WHAT A GREAT PARENTS MARY AND JOSEPH WERE, AND HOW THEY FORMED THE IDEAL FAMILY, AND HOW IT WAS IMPORTANT FOR EVERY CATHOLIC FAMILY TO TRY TO BUILD A HOLY FAMILY LIKE THEY HAD. ON THE WAY HOME FROM CHURCH, MY MOTHER, WHO HAD THREE FAIRLY NORMAL CHILDREN, REMARKED THAT IT WAS EASY FOR MARY AND JOSEPH TO HAVE A HOLY FAMILY, AFTER ALL, THEY ONLY HAD ONE CHILD AND HE WAS PERFECT. MOM THE THEOLOGIAN.

IN ALL THE GOSPELS WE HAVE ONE STORY ABOUT JESUS BETWEEN HIS INFANCY AND HIS PUBLIC MINISTRY, AND THIS IS IT. ODDLY ENOUGH, THERE WERE HUNDREDS OF STORIES CIRCULATING IN EARLY CHRISTENDOM, SOME IF WHICH FILTERED DOWN EVEN TO TODAY. THERE IS A SECOND CENTURY WRITING CALLED “THE GOSPEL OF THE INFANCY OF JESUS” IN WHICH WE HEAR THAT ONE DAY JOSEPH AND JESUS HAD BUILT A BED FOR A CUSTOMER, WHO WAS TOO LONG FOR IT. SO JESUS JUST GRABBED ONE END AND STRETCHED THE BED ABOUT SIX INCHES. ANOTHER STORY HAD TO DO WITH JESUS MAKING LITTLE CLAY BIRDS AND PUTTING THEM ON A FENCE. SOME KIDS CAME ALONG AND STARTED THROWING ROCKS. JESUS WAVED HIS HANDS AND THE BIRDS FLEW AWAY. THAT STORY I FIRST HEARD FROM MY NEARLY ILLITERATE GERMAN GRANDMOTHER, SO IT HAD GREAT STAYING POWER. THERE WERE PROBABLY A LOT OF STORIES WHEN LUKE WROTE HIS GOSPEL; HE MAY HAVE EVEN HEARD MORE THAN THIS ONE FROM MARY HERSELF. BUT HE ONLY CHOSE THIS ONE TO INCLUDE IN HIS GOSPEL. I THINK ONE OF THE REASONS WAS THAT HE WANTED US TO SEE THAT BEING A HOLY FAMILY DOES NOT MEAN EVERYTHING IS PERFECT. TO JOSEPH AND MARY, THE POSSIBILITY OF HAVING LOST THEIR ONLY SON WAS DEVASTATING. I AM SURE WORDS WERE EXCHANGED ABOUT WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE DONE WHAT. EVEN LOVERS, EVEN SAINTS, HAVE MOMENTS OF FRICTION AND HARD FEELINGS; IT'S A HUMAN CONDITION.

SO WHAT MAKES A FAMILY? POPE PAUL VI GAVE A DEFINITION: A FAMILY IS A COMMUNITY OF LOVE AND SHARING, BEAUTIFUL FOR THE PROBLEMS IT POSES AND THE REWARD IT BRINGS, THE PERFECT SETTING FOR THE REARING OF CHILDREN. WE KNOW VERY LITTLE ABOUT THE FAMILY OF JESUS. BUT THAT IT WAS A COMMUNITY OF LOVE IS UNQUESTIONABLE; JOSEPH LAID DOWN HIS LIFE EVERY DAY FOR MARY AND JESUS – NOT TERRIBLY DIFFERENT FROM MANY OF YOU FATHERS. MARY CREATED A HOME FOR JOSEPH – THAT DOESN'T MEAN SHE BROUGHT HIM A DRINK AND THE NEWSPAPER WHEN HE CAME HOME AFTER A HARD DAY'S WORK; WE KNOW THAT WOMEN IN MARY'S CIRCUMSTANCES WORKED EVERY BIT AS HARD AS THEIR HUSBANDS AT MAKING A LIVING. SHE AND JOSEPH WERE NOT COMPETITORS, BUT RATHER, THEY COMPLEMENTED EACH OTHER. AND THAT'S MUCH LIKE MANY OF THE COUPLES IN OUR PARISH. IT ISN'T A MATTER OF THE WOMAN'S ROLE OR THE MAN'S ROLE, IT'S THE FACT THAT IN A COMMUNITY OF LOVE AND SHARING, EACH MAKES AN EFFORT TO HELP THE OTHER MEMBERS BECOME THE BEST PERSONS THEY CAN BE; AND THAT MEANS THAT WE RECOGNIZE EACH OTHERS STRENGTHS AND ENCOURAGE THEIR DEVELOPMENT; AND WHERE YOU ARE NOT STRONG, I WILLINGLY TAKE ON THAT BURDEN. IF A WIFE COMES HOME FROM WORK TIRED AND WORN OUT, HER HUSBAND BETTER KNOW HOW TO COOK. IF A HUSBAND CAN BARELY ADD AND SUBTRACT, MAYBE HIS WIFE SHOULD HANDLE THE FAMILY FINANCES.

THE COMMUNITY OF THE FAMILY IS BEAUTIFUL FOR THE PROBLEMS IT POSES AND THE REWARD IT BRINGS. I'M SURE YOU'VE KNOWN MANY COUPLES WHO HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR FIFTY YEARS OR MORE. THEY CAN LOOK BACK AND SEE THAT TOGETHER THEY HANDLED EVERY CHALLENGE, EVERY HEARTBREAK, EVERY ADJUSTMENT; AND THEY TAKE GREAT SATISFACTION IN KNOWING THAT THEY MET WHATEVER WAS THROWN AT THEM, EVEN THOUGH THEY DIDN'T SEE THOSE MOMENTS AS BEAUTIFUL WHEN THEY HAPPENED. I THINK MOST COUPLES KNOW THE BEAUTY OF SOLVING GOOD PROBLEMS TOGETHER; BUYING A HOUSE OR CAR; HELPING A CHILD SELECT A COLLEGE. BUT THERE IS BEAUTY IN HOW THE BAD PROBLEMS ARE HANDLED; THE LOSS OF A JOB; A CHRONIC ILLNESS.

AND A FAMILY IS THE PERFECT SETTING FOR THE RAISING OF CHILDREN. I KNOW THAT THERE ARE MANY CHILDREN WHO ARE RAISED IN BROKEN FAMILIES, OR BY A SINGLE MOTHER OR FATHER. THEY'LL TURN OUT. LOVE CAN FIX A LOT OF THINGS. AND THERE ARE CHILDREN WHO WOULD BE BETTER OFF IF THEIR PARENTS WEREN'T TOGETHER. THEY'LL TURN OUT AS WELL. BUT TO BE THE CHILD OF PARENTS WHO LOVE EACH OTHER; TO EXPERIENCE THE DIFFERENT WAYS A FATHER LOVES AND A MOTHER LOVES; TO LEARN FIRST-HAND THE BEAUTIFUL COMPLEMENTARITY OF THE SEXES – THAT'S A PRIVILEGE WHICH SEEMS TO BE GETTING MORE AND MORE UNUSUAL. THE TENTH MOST COMMON REQUEST KIDS MADE FOR CHRISTMAS WAS TO HAVE A DAD.

CERTAINLY WE SEE THE ELEMENTS OF A FAMILY IN MARY, JOSEPH, AND JESUS. WE KNOW OF SOME OF THE PROBLEMS THEY FACED BY THE STORIES IN THE GOSPELS, LIKE THIS ONE. WE KNOW MORE GENERALLY HOW PEOPLE LIVED IN THAT TIME AND THE PROBLEMS THEY FACED TOGETHER. AND WHEN WE THINK ABOUT JOSEPH AND MARY AND JESUS, WE SEE THAT THEIR FAMILY IS NOT ALL THAT DIFFERENT FROM OUR OWN FAMILIES, AND THEIR PROBLEMS PRETTY MUCH LIKE OUR OWN. THEY MIGHT HAVE BEEN PERFECT PEOPLE, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN THEY HAD A FREE RIDE. EVERY DAY EACH HAD TO MAKE DECISIONS THAT AFFECTED THE OTHERS, AND WE KNOW THAT WITH EVERY DECISION YOU GIVE UP SOMETHING FOR SOMETHING ELSE. AND EVEN SAINTS PROBABLY HAVE DIFFERENT IDEAS OF WHICH GOOD THING TO GIVE UP FOR ANOTHER GOOD THING. FRICTION HAPPENS.

SO HOW CAN A FAMILY BE HOLY? CERTAINLY JOSEPH WAS A JUST MAN, AND HIS BEHAVIOR SHOWED A WILLING OBEDIENCE TO GOD'S VOICE. AND MARY, NO ONE WAS HOLIER THAN SHE WHOM AN ANGEL CALLED “FULL OF GRACE”. BUT WHAT REALLY MADE THIS FAMILY HOLY WAS THE PRESENCE OF JESUS CHRIST. IF HE IS IN THE MIDST OF THE FAMILY, IN EACH OTHER, IN THE SONS AND DAUGHTERS GOD GIVES, THEN GOD HIMSELF LIVES IN THAT FAMILY, AND PRESERVES IT AND NOURISHES IT. A HOLY FAMILY BRINGS CHRIST INTO THE WORLD.

MARY AND JOSEPH NEVER HAD IT EASY. WE THINK JOSEPH DIED BEFORE JESUS BEGAN HIS PUBLIC MINISTRY; THAT WOULD MAKE MARY SOMEWHERE IN HER LATE TWENTIES TO EARLY FORTIES, ALONE AND WITHOUT MUCH IN THE WAY OF RESOURCES. AND MARY HAD TO FACE THE TRAGEDY OF JESUS' DEATH ON THE CROSS ALONE, AND I'M SURE SHE WOULD HAVE LIKED TO SHARE THE JOY OF HIS RESURRECTION WITH JOSEPH. BUT IN ANY HOLY FAMILY, YOU TAKE WHAT YOU ARE GIVEN, YOU KEEP FOCUSED ON BRINGING JESUS INTO THE WORLD, YOU DRAW STRENGTH FROM EACH OTHER, AND YOU KNOW THAT A DAY WILL COME WHEN YOU, LIKE JOSEPH AND MARY, WILL ENTER THE PRESENCE OF JESUS WHO WILL SAY, “WELL DONE, GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANTS.”.