Matthew 14:22-33
Can you remember a time when you were really, really afraid? Once when my family and I were vacationing in Acadia National Park, I took my two youngest down to the water, which meant climbing down some not too difficult rocks. After a while we decided to go back up by another route, a more difficult climb. As we climbed the tide came in, making it impossible to go back down. And I had two children perched on the cliff wall and had to figure out a way to get them to the top. That was a moment of intense fear but after collecting myself and breaking down the problem into smaller pieces, I managed to get us all to the top of the cliff, back to the road, and back to our campsite.
You and I probably have irrational fears as well. I’m afraid of heights. I don’t like to stand on balconies looking down, even when there is a railing in place. I know someone who is afraid of going out of her house. I remember a word I learned a long time ago -triskaidekaphobia-- the fear of the number thirteen. What is your irrational fear?
The apostles had a real fear -- that they were going to drown; and an irrational fear -- that what they were witnessing was a ghost. The world today is a fearful place, we have both rational fears -- like atomic war breaking out, or climate change destroying our world; and irrational fears -- of the stranger that turns up in our midst, the one with a foreign accent or odd looking clothes or wearing a hijab. And we and the world long to cry out for a savior.
And that’s what this miracle is all about. It’s not just another case of Jesus demonstrating that he is capable of miracles, that he is the Son of God, that he is God incarnate. If we are reading through Matthew or in fact any of the gospels, we soon become immune to the miracles. Another healing, another exorcism, more drowning pigs, more escaping the clutches of the Pharisees.
The apostles were deathly afraid. They would have given anything to get out of there, to escape the danger they were in. Real dangers. Imagined dangers. To be somewhere else, on dry land, away from ghosts. And that’s usually what we pray for when we are very afraid -- “Get me out of here, Lord.”
But that’s not Jesus’ way. Jesus comes to the disciples through the storm. When you think about it, this makes sense. After all, God is in the storm, in the water. He created everything and wherever something of his creation exists, he is there. When the angel tells Joseph to take Mary into his home despite the fact that she is with child, he calls the child Emmanuel -- which means “God with us”. Jesus is God with us, that’s the whole point of the Incarnation.
So the apostles, in their fear, realize their helplessness, and in that moment God comes into their lives in Jesus. Our storms and fears are where we abandon ourselves to God. But most of the time, we don’t do this until we feel that God has abandoned us. It’s in the very midst of the storm that threatens us that new life emerges. That of course is the crucifixion and resurrection -- we need to become empty before God can fill us up.
Of all the apostles, Peter seems to get it this time. “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” The other apostles are content to stay in the boat; Peter recognizes Jesus in the middle of the storm and one his word, steps out of the boat, and we can assume walks on the water for at least a few steps. And when Peter’s fears overcome his confidence in Jesus, Emmanuel, God with us, he sinks, but he has enough faith to cry out again, “Save me”, and Jesus does.
Sometimes when we read about saints we envy their faith, their certainty. But what we know of Peter is that sometimes his faith was strong and sometimes weak or non-existent. I think that’s the way most of us are. When things are going well, we have the sense that God is on our side, blessing us with his generosity and love. But when things turn bad, when the storms of life begin to rock our boat, we ask, “Where are you, God?” forgetting that He is with us, holding out his hand, promising he will save us.
Peter must have grown in his faith. Legend has it that when he was condemned he asked to be crucified upside down, because he wasn’t worthy to die as Jesus had died. But it took a lifetime to get to that point. Follow Peter through the New Testament and you will see someone who is like you and I even after the resurrection, even after spending three years watching Jesus do the works of God. According to John, after the Resurrection Peter didn’t know what to do next, so he said, “I’m going fishing”. I’m going to return to where I feel safe where I know how things work. And after Peter received the great commission, to feed Jesus’ lambs and sheep, he had to be reprimanded by Paul because he stopped eating with the Gentile converts. So don’t be disheartened if your faith wavers; so did Peter. And remember that even with a little faith, Jesus is there to take you through the storm.
